Guide To Dating MTF's

[drakkon]

I thought I'd start a thread here for MTF's to discuss the sorts of things they look for when seeking dates. What are your passions? Your peeves? Do you seek romance? What do you define as romantic? Often MTF's are much taller than the men who seek them out; do you have an issue with height? Why? Why not?

Let's get a dialog going.


Dre---


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Don't make someone your priority while allowing yourself to be their option

[melbtrans]

Dating, a strange and exotic topic lol.

When im looking for dates, i like to know that the guy has a gsoh, a smile which is never false, a genuine interest and a good heart.

My idea of a good date to me and im not preaching we are all the same,
is to talk to a guy get to know him over the phone and home visitations first.

Then if we get along and share a few common ground interests i like to go to a nice restuarant followed by a nice time cuddling and kissing/pecking each other then on to more serious/fun times if we are comfortable with each other.

I dont have issues with weight/height but i will stress that I do look for a good weight in a guy as being too skinny is a dangerous view for bad health. Being Obese is not good either, so a fine balance is what i look for.

Sex, oh well, cant be too fussy here but it is important I beleive that ur partner/s should know and accept us for what we are, who we are and how we are, only then can passion ignite between partners. I had one guy that loves pre-op transsexuals but hated the newly blossoming ones ( talking of my own experiences ) so it was a disaster but im sure the next lover i get will be more appreciative.



Life is a river, sometimes far and wide, sometimes narrow and short,
But no matter the direction of the current, it is the person that gazes upon
the waters reflections that make the decisions for which they travel.

[savannat]

`I seek romance. I want to have a partner and a person to cuddle up with and keep me company. But at the same time my passions are reading and writing and listening to music, and my peeves in people are people who beat around a bush instead of getting to the point, I am annoyed by stupidity.

Romance to me is watching a movie in the theater with the one I love snuggled up against their shoulder and having a grand time. Romance to me is having a dinner date with my partner and having wonderful conversation or walking on a beach or in nature or sitting comfortably in front of a roaring fire in a fireplace. Of course to me the location and what my partner and I would do is not entirely important, the point to me is just being together and doing whatever with her.

As a guy I once was overweight, and had horrible posture. I understand that as I become a woman I will be a little freakishly tall (I technically am 5'11") but as I retrain myself in posture I am 5'10." I guess what im trying to say is that height to me is not important. Weight is important to me because I can relate.

Im looking forward to dating again, but thats my 2 cents worth.

[poisonismycure]

`I'm in the early beginning stages of transition and never really had much dating experience. I enjoy cuddling, dinner and movies, dancing, every girl likes romantic gestures such as presents (poetry, music/songs, flowers, etc.) and compliments. I'm not confident in my appearance to really go out. as far as --- goes it depends on the gender of my partner and what their preferences and what my partner is comfortable with.

[poisonismycure]

`As far as height is concerned I am relatively lucky as I am 5'6" which is about average, I am overweight I'm trying to loose weight and slim down. I find tall people slightly intimidating especially men. I have no particular gender preference as a relationship should be built on how well we connect as people and the quality of time we spend together. Ethnicity is unimportant. For males I prefer clean shaven with average to muscular build height less than 6' 2". I have a fondness for Punk/Goth/Metal/Emo/Scene Girls and Guys. I can't stand massive amounts of facial hair or body hair. I have a zero tolerance policy when it comes to illegal drugs. I am very shy and generally will not make the first move, I like open minded people and enjoy PDA's. I also like people who are intelligent and creative. I know who I am, what I want, and where I want to be in life you should to.

[(deleted)]

`I can only speak for myself, but I'd like to add that I like to be treated like a Lady, with respect and dignity. Many of the relationship contacts I've had, (say 95%) have been with hormone/fetish driven MEN. Do you guys think that because we were born males then we think like one?! Ummm that's a negatron ghostrider. We do not. We think and identify as members of the opposite ---. So when it comes to meeting new people, the first words that we hear/read, shouldn't be "Hey Babe, Hey Sexy", "Dang gurl you look fine as ----. wanna bone?". (Puke), so is that how you guys speak to regular women? I hope not, you'd get slapped.

SO, IF YOU'RE IN THIS FOR JUST THE SEX/FETISH OF IT, THEN SAVE UR MONEY AND GO BUY AN ESCORT.

IF you're truly attracted to Trans-Women, and or women and you would like to spend time with one, and get to know one, and maybe even fall in love with one, or just to find a friend to better understand us, then perhaps you should take the approach of introducing yourself PROPERLY, spare us telling us the size of your huge c---, and ask us intelligent questions. Most Trans-women are very intelligent, so ask us intelligent questions. Tell us about yourself, what your hobbies are, what your future goals are, where you have been, where you plan to go... etc. This way, we CAN KNOW WHO YOU ARE! lol Because last time I checked, I don't just go out to meet some d-bag who thinks I'm "Sexy as ----", in a hotel room for a quickie and some HIV.

Be normal, and you'll get normal. And after a while it may become GREAT!

Sona

[a1oenesome]

`Anyone who uses terms like "shema*e" or "ladyb*y" is going to be exploitative and is going to have a morbid interest in the contents of one's panties.

I actually had an e-mail conversation the other day with one of these people and he was pretty unpleasant and slimy while trying to sound conversational. They don't all use text speak, even if most do.

People who use text speak: If they can't be bothered making an effort to write clearly and properly, they shouldn't expect an answer.

Likewise people who push a ------ agenda. It's a dating site and if you like each other it might happen, no need to make clumsy, ill timed and uncalled for remarks.

As far as some of these men contracting the services of a "professional", I can only imagine (going by their writing and comments) that they neither have the finances nor the social skills to negotiate such a contract, so they come here instead.

I'm sure there must be some nice men out there, but I have yet to meet them.

Good luck.

[(deleted)]

`Step 1. Find a trans girl you like.
Step 2. Ask for their number
Step 3. Call them up (after waiting a day as dating rules strictly advise) and ask for a date
Step 4. Go on said date, make sure your presentable
Step 5. Possibly make out on your date
Step 6. Call them again after your date, maybe next day
Step 7. Repeat process until you ask them out

Wow this seems hard.

[(deleted)]

The thing I look for when seeking a date is compatibility. Whether we can hold a conversation for more than a few minutes and the person is reasonably intelligent and insightful. I personally prefer someone who shares common interests, but perhaps can expose me to new things and vice versa.

I think romance is very important, but it is also not something to force and try to create. I think many people get caught in the hegemony and just do flowers and candy because it is expected, and that can be nice, however to me romance can be reading to one another from a favorite book, or camping together and enjoying the stars or a nice campfire; or perhaps massaging your calves after a particularly long hike. It is sharing time with someone you are building a true connection with.

As far as passions and peeves, I prefer to share those slowly as I get to know someone.

As someone else said earlier, height for me is not something I thought about. I am 5'6" and so am usually not seen as tall. When I started transition it just never crossed my mind. I can say however that I have dated a couple guys a little shorter than me, and it didn't bother me. Most guys are much taller so I feel just fine. I do however have to admit I like that feeling of being shorter and being able to just rest my head on my partners chest or shoulder.